the upward spiral

there is so much to be thankful for...one thing though even as i write this that i feel is that it is definitely so much easier to thank him when things are going good...but since i dont thank him when im down, i might as well thank him now

the 6 months that you separated me from a job, church, friends, you taught me so many basic habits, so many basics of life like being close to you that now that my life will seemingly get busier i hope i can continue to keep them.
the balance between work and church.
its funny looking back how you took me through various jobs, how you took me through various seasons of working full-time, not having time for ministry, getting frustrated and shifting down to part-time, while dabbling w/ ministry, only to be then caught up w/ ministry that i would soon find every excuse even purposefully creating an environment where i would have to quit. what drove a lot of that? was it my works-oriented slant on ministry? was it my lack of commitment to work, laziness, and an attraction to lukewarm ministry? was it a form of escapism from reality hiding my insecurities behind a veil of works-oriented ministry?
whatever the reason, i am finding myself walking the line of attempting to do things on my own and allowing God to lead me, to wait in essence for God's timing rather than my own restlessness telling me that its God pushing me to move on. and even as i write this, do i really know my intentions? probably not. so where does that leave me...

i know for a fact that i found a church where there are no expectations placed on me except those that i place on myself. i know that this church will be there even if im not. and i know that if i want to be a part of this, they are very welcoming of that.

i also know that there is a job that i really like being a part of. my co-workers are nice and my boss is super helpful. ive had nice co-workers before...but not much luck w/ the latter so im very super thankful for this. a boss that cares goes a long way. and it keeps me in the thick of things, keeps me from being too one-sided on this whole faith/God thing...like the other day we were joking around in the teachers' lounge as we were handed out name tags for the office party and one of the teachers said yeah, you forgot professor in front of mine and another chimed in saying yeah, you forgot doctor in front of mine and pointing to me saying, yeah and you forgot archbishop in front of his...it was really funny...anyway

and schools good. getting along quite smoothly in hebrew and the counseling class offers me a lot to think about and im excited to be taking greek as well next term.

so i pray for God's blessings upon your life wherever you are and that he will draw you ever so closely to him.